Fattening Fridays: Today's Secret Ingredient... New Mom Tears

It's Friday, a day with a whole new meaning now that it is a day I spend at home with L. Fridays used to be the day that nothing got done at work after noon, happy hour started around 3 (in the office), and then I'd  meet up with S and some friends after work for drinks and maybe dinner. Maybe we would get home at 10pm, maybe 2:30am. It was Friday... the key word being WAS. Now Friday is the day I change the sheets on the beds, do 3-5 loads of laundry, visit the grocery store for a mini weekend run, and wonder if S will be home from work early. But I still love it. Just not 2:30am love. 

For this edition of Fattening Friday I'm going to share a little secret about something that tastes homemade but comes in a box. Two things actually. I keep one box of something like this in my pantry most of the time because sometimes we get surprised by something and I need to be able to put together a dessert quickly. I first had them at a company crawfish boil when I thought someone spent hours in the kitchen to bring amazing homemade dessert love. I was wrong. You know who spent hours in the kitchen? Betty Crocker. And thank goodness, because she created the Supreme Bars line. The two I recommend for a very fudgey tasting home cooked experience are the Mississippi Mud and the Cookie Brownie. 

Well.... Hello there

For both of these I recommend baking in a small square baking dish. Especially with the cookie brownie because when you drop the cookie dolups onto the brownie bottom, you want it to look good, not like you just dropped cookie plops on top. (remember, you are trying to make people THINK you did this on your own.)

And again, Hello.

Am I telling you this is healthy? No. It's Fattening Friday, get a grip. I am telling you that you are busy and so am I. Don't keep this in your house so that one Friday you can bake a whole pan and eat it alone. That is what half pints of ice cream are for. Keep a box of this for when you need to bring dessert last minute or when you have surprise dinner guests. I made both of them for the nurses at my doctor's office after Landon was born and they were like "how did you find the time to cook all of this." And I wondered if they could taste the salt from my tears when my hormones made me cry about the fear of SIDS for the 40th time, but maybe they added to the flavor. 

Here is what the above should look like upon completion:

Mississippi Mud

Cookie Brownie

 To locate a store near you that carries the brand you can go here. I get mine at the grocery store and I've seen them at Target before. Everyone who works hard to be healthy most of the time deserves an easy dessert treat. If you just can't stand it when you need something sweet, just do what I do. Make a whole pan so you can have one piece and then give it to your neighbors or take it to work. Makes food disappear much faster. Warning, this can sometimes cause neighbors and coworkers to gain weight and curse you. It's a risk you should be willing to take. 

-RT

Fattening Friday: Graduate Degrees & Strawberry Pudding

Hey there! Tomorrow is Friday. Wow. So before I get to the part where I talk about food and ingredients and cooking, I would like to tell you a personal tidbit. Get food out of your head for a second. 

Education is really important to our family, so I'm going to brag a little bit and tell you about a few new degrees I have been awarded. You see, Landon had reflux, so back in 2011 I received my graduate degree in spit up. I mastered the 8 outfit change day, the midday bath, the four loads of baby laundry in one day, and aced my final in how to remove spit up stains. Being the overachiever that I am, I am now on day three of my doctorate in vomit. That's right... VOMIT. Is this too personal? Because I'm not good at vomit and Landon has a stomach bug. I need to talk about it with you. I NEED to put it out there in the internet world. Here Internet, have this. I don't want it back. 

"Sorry for Vomiting (SFV)" Love, Landon

I can count on one hand the amount of times that I have thrown up in my living memory. I try to avoid it at all costs. Now I have a tiny person not eating anything, but if she happens to eat a bite, she voms. And not on the tile floor either... she hits a rug EVERY time. Watch out sports world, this kid has aim. And can anyone tell me how to make a baby drink pedialite? Why do they make something for  babies that babies won't drink? I can already tell, this degree is going to be tough. And it's only just beginning. Ok, I'm done with vomit talk and throw up stuff. Take a deep breath, cleanse your mind and clear your head. We need to talk about food.

Strange enough to make you forget all of the above?

Earlier this week my Uncle passed away. I've been thinking about him and it brought back a lot of great memories of growing up and visiting my dad's side of the family in East Texas. Everyone in the family cooked. I would wake up to the smell of my Grandpa frying breakfast pork chops while my Grandma started mixing dough for biscuits. They had a beautiful garden full of fresh vegetables, peas, and beans. There were at least two pies, strawberry pudding, and sometimes a cobbler every time we came for a visit. My Grandma whipped her pie meringue by hand using a dinner fork. I didn't associate my Uncle with food until after my Grandparents had passed and I got to see him cooking more often. He would mix up dirty rice for a family gathering and made chicken and dumplings just like my Grandma. People who like to cook for others are people who like to put people at ease. He was that kind of guy to me. Someone who always wanted everyone to be having a good time. He will be missed, but I have some pretty wonderful memories including one of my 200+ pound Uncle doing a flip off the diving board into the pool in blue jeans. He had a lot of fun and was well loved.

Uncle R with my cousin V

I wanted to take this occasion to share a family recipe. "Family Recipe" is code for "not healthy." I was thinking about all of the great things that my grandparents introduced me to, that my Uncle loved to cook, and that my mother has perfected for when I crave them. The truth is, I have never personally cooked them. When I make collard greens I chop them and do a saute steam in a measured amount of EV Olive Oil with garlic. That is not the way it is done in East Texas. My regular diet doesn't allow room for Hot Water Cornbread, fried until it is nice and crispy on the outside, but soft and warm in the middle. If I put up a pot of beans I usually do black beans with brown rice. I don't put up peas with bacon fat in a cast iron pot that has been flavored for 20 years. Maybe Fattening Fridays will become a thing and you can all sit back while I learn how to cook all of that and put on 10 lbs. There is always a place for comfort food. 

Grandma J

What I do know is my Grandma's strawberry pudding recipe. It is completely not good for you with the exception of the strawberries. It is so sweet you might get a cavity when you eat it. I actually cut the sugar in half from the original recipe. My Grandma didn't keep recipes, she cooked from memory, so in order to get this I had to sit her down in my parent's kitchen and have her supervise me. I'm glad I did. She passed away shortly after. If there is one thing that reminds me of my East Texas family, it is good Southern comfort food, fudge pie, and strawberry pudding. 

This is one I made in May about to go in the refrigerator to set. 

Ingredients: 

4 eggs

1 C Sugar
1/2 stick of butter
2T Flour

1C Milk (I use whole milk, this is not the time for health )
1T Vanilla
2 boxes of Nilla Wafers (I always get two just in case the first box runs out) 

2 plastic crates of strawberries, thinly sliced

I use a 9 X 13 inch rectangular pan but you can use any size. Grease your pan with butter and begin by placing a layer of nilla wafers on the bottom of the pan. Then you will line wafers or sliced strawberries along the walls of the pan so the entire pan is covered. 

Layer strawberries and wafers back and forth until you reach the top of the pan or your desired layer level. Layer liberally, but not so tightly that the pudding won't be able to get through the layers. 

In the same pot you will use on the stove (these are exact instructions), mix the flour and the sugar together. Add the eggs and stir well. I use three whole eggs but just the yolk of the fourth egg. I think it really adds to the custard. Place the pot on the stove over medium low heat. Add Milk. In a separate dish melt the butter and then add it to the pot. Add Vanilla. 

Stir mixture constantly as it cooks and thickens. It takes some patience to get it just right. Make sure the fire isn't too hot as it will burn the bottom of the pudding. Continue to stir scraping the thicker pudding from the bottom of the pan. 

Once the mixture has gained some thickness, but is still runny, pour half of the pudding over the pan of nilla wafers and strawberries. You do this so "it will run through the bottom and make the wafers soft and soupy." Don't skip this step. Trust me. Continue to cook the remainder of the pudding until it has reached standard pudding consistency. Pour the remainder over the pan. Refrigerate (I prefer to leave it overnight) until it is set and enjoy!

Tastes amazing with a cold glass of milk and even better during the summer when strawberries are in season. 

Do you have a food that reminds you of your grandparents or relatives? Just spending time thinking about my family made me realize how many of our good memories have to do with the smells of food cooking, the delivery of frozen greens and peas from the garden, the taste of meringue pinched from the top of a pie in the refrigerator, or taking a bite of leftover Hot Water Cornbread on my Grandparents back porch while a George Strait cassette played. Those are the kind of moments we all need to slow down and remember more often. 

Have an amazing weekend!

-RT

Food for the Soul: Cooking for Others

There are things that we get away from as society grows and we further isolate ourselves from our neighbors. The more we turn toward our computers, our phones, and our own needs, the more we lose the connections with those around us. Don't get me wrong, I'm not anti progress, but there are certain old fashioned ways that I hold dear and will do my best to continue. Here is something about me: I like to be useful. But sometimes, the best way to be useful is to not incessantly ask someone "what can I do?" The most important times in our lives, the ones that are the highest peaks and the lowest valleys, are the times when people are needed. But what CAN you do? You can feed the soul by feeding the person.

Food is a group hug for your stomach. Your stomach told me this.

I tend to be good at bad situations. I can't think of a better way to put it. When the world around me is falling apart, the only way I thrive is by being the one who keeps it together. And I keep it together by doing what I can do for the people who have lost more than I have. When someone loses a loved one, I cook. If I can't cook because we have to leave town to be there, I clean. If I can't cook and I can't clean, I send flowers and eat ice cream at home while watching a rom com.

When a new baby is born, I LOVE IT. While I didn't get it as much before having my own baby, how can you not LOVE a brand new baby and all of the brand new joy that goes along with it? You have to. Those are the rules. When a baby is born, I cook. And then I buy monogrammed things and tell L she has a new friend (who she can only look at and not touch for four months), and then I cook some more.

Because I have been the recipient of meals cooked lovingly by others I know how much they really mean. It's more than just a meal, it is love and it is warmth and it is food for the SOUL. When you haven't slept all night because you have a new baby and you have amazing friends drop something from their kitchen on your front door, it is better than Christmas. When you wake up after an hour of sleep to breast feed a colicky baby and find your mother cooking in your kitchen, it is a memory that will last a lifetime. 

I am fortunate enough to not yet be the recipient of sympathy food, but sympathy food is something that is somewhat selfish for me. When I know someone that I love is hurting, it is something I can do for them that is useful and that I know will serve a purpose.

At the end of last week, S's first cousin once removed passed away. He and S's father grew up together and he thought of him very much like a brother, so it was a difficult loss for his parents. He was also a really fun and wonderful man in lots of ways who hosted us in Pittsburgh when we were engaged and helped us celebrate our wedding. He was instrumental in the craft beer movement in Pennsylvania and although he was taken too soon, he lived a great life. 

When I heard that he had passed away, I was already on my way to the store, so I stocked up on the things I needed to make a casserole for S's parents so they wouldn't have to worry about cooking for a few days. My first rule in bringing food to others is to cook something that you love to eat. That way you know that it is good. I went for King Ranch Casserole and I was on a time crunch since I had Landy with me and because S's dad was going to swing by and pick it up. Also, this is not a "healthy" recipe, but I make it as healthy as possible. Please just don't focus too much on the cheese quantity. You are the one sprinkling, you can sprinkle as much as you want (or don't want).

Time Crunch King Ranch Chicken Casserole (for the soul)

Makes two pans if you use a 7" x 11" rectangular pan

I made one in a 13" x 9" rectangular pan with another small one in an 8" x 8" square pan

Ingredients: 

time crunch ingredient: Store Rotisserie Chicken

or

non time crunch ingredient: 3 - 4 cups of cooked, shredded chicken

2 large onions

1 red bell pepper

1 green bell pepper

3 - 6 cloves of garlic (optional, if you like garlic)

1 T EV Olive Oil

2 cans of healthy request cream of chicken soup (low sodium if they have it)

2 cans of healthy request cream of mushroom soup (low sodium if they have it)

2 cans of original rotel, drained

2 t Chili Powder

2 t garlic powder

20 corn tortillas

4 C of shredded cheese (mexican four cheese blend works well)

Salt & Pepper to taste

Chop your onions and peppers and mince your garlic. Then put a large stock pot on the stove over medium heat to warm up the pan. Combine the onions, peppers and garlic.

Chopped Onion with a trash bowl nearby.

Chopped peppers

About to murder the garlic. Then combine it all.

Pour the EV Olive oil in the pan to coat the bottom and add the onion, pepper, garlic mixture to pan, cooking over medium and stirring until everything is soft.

Pan Party

If I cook my own chicken, I actually do that first so it has time to cool before I need to shred it. Since I used a rotisserie chicken I shredded it while the vegetables were cooking.

Half way mark for shredding.

When your veggies are soft and the onions are clear, add the cans of chicken and mushroom soup, the rotel (drained), the shredded chicken, the chili powder, and the garlic powder. Salt and pepper to taste.

REMINDER: if you are making for someone else and you don't know their salt/pepper preferences, keep your salt and pepper in check. They can always season later to their taste.

Empty soup

Rotel

One big gooey family.

After a couple minutes over medium heat, remove the mixture from the stove. At this point in my cooking, S's dad showed up early and I was put into overhaul mode to finish their larger casserole. What you see below is just the smaller one we kept for ourselves.

Grease the bottom of your pan with your preffered method. Then add a layer of tortillas, torn, until the bottom is covered.

torn tortilla bottom

Next, add a layer of your chicken mixture

Second layer

And last, sprinkle with cheese

Then start again with torn tortillas

More chicken mixture

More cheese

Grand finale, one more tortilla layer, skip the chicken mixture and go straight to the cheese. This layer gets really crispy and crunchy when you put the casserole in the oven.

And there you have it.

A side view of the layers.

If you were making this for immediate consumption, you would put it in the oven at 350 degrees for 25 - 30 minutes or until the top is toasty with bubbling cheese.

Our casserole was a giveaway and we didn't cook the one we made for ourselves until the following day. In these isntances you cover the casserole and put it in the refrigerator. If well covered you can also freeze the casserole. To cook after freezing or refrigerating, simply bring the casserole back to room temp and heat your oven to 350 degrees and cook it for 25 - 30 minutes or until the top is toasty with bubbling cheese.

If there was a food in the world with the ability to group hug, it would be a warm casserole. This is one of my favorites.

Cooking for others doesn't have to be a practice you turn to just for loss of life or new births. Maybe you know someone who is having a hard time, maybe you have new neighbors, or maybe you just want to see a friend smile. That's right guys, I'm getting cheesy and sentimental, but it's true. Cooking for someone else is a wonderful gift and it means so much to the recipient of the meal that took your time and thought to create.

Cooking is a cherished practice that should be undertaken by everyone. Make every meal a celebration, and every time you cook remember that you are feeding more than just an empty stomach.

-RT

Naked Dinner Parties

Get your mind out of the gutter. No matter what you are thinking, naked dinner parties aren't like this:

Who wants to go to this dinner party?

EVERYONE.

 Confession: Until last Saturday I thought that Jamie Oliver was called "The Naked Chef" because he started his career cooking in the nude to gain recognition. Seriously. Just think about the naked cowboy and it makes total sense. Come on, it does. Well anyway, it turns out I was wrong.

Our friends R & C invited us over to their new place for dinner last Saturday night. You might remember R and her amazing hors. She is fantastic. For years and years and lots of dinners out we heard about how C was such a great chef. It was all very suspicious though because he is British and they never invited us over to eat. Just a low brow Brit cooking joke for C to rib me about later. For company and cooking's sake, we were really looking forward to dinner. 

We arrived at their gorgeous new home and kicked things off with wine and a tour. We also cut into the cheese and bread with a vengeance, so please forgive me for the following picture...

Oops. We ate it all before I got the blogging bug.

 R made an amazing orzo veggie toss in advance. It was a recipe she got from her mom and it was fantastic. We took leftovers and Landy was all over them. So was I. 

R & C were just across the pond for a family wedding and brought back some proper Hunter Wellies for L. ADORE.

Also known as galoshes, but not as fun to say.

While R & I were drooling over wellies and she was showing me this fantastic new blog design she surprised me with (the one you are seeing right now. really, she is the MOST amazing, trust me), the boys were finishing up dinner in the kitchen. While I am lacking knowledge of exactly what was going on back in the kitchen, I have pieced some bits together.

Upon arrival we saw a pizza stone in the oven. MAJOR excitement. It's so professional and very legit. I had to try and not eat too much crusty bread so I would have more room for pizza crusty crust. Decisions decisions. I have never used a pizza stone, but C says you need to preheat it in the oven until it is super hot (475 or more) to achieve maximum crusty crust all around. I said "crusty crust",  not him.

We brought crackers and no one ate them. This bread was warm, crusty, and the only thing my eyes could see.

C reads my blog because he's cool like that. He told me I would really like Jamie Oliver because we cook in a very similar fashion. My response: "Isn't he the guy who cooks naked?" Guys, you don't even know. I wasn't thinking he wasn't a good chef or anything, I just thought he was a showman. Someone who did crazy things for PR. Then I felt like a HUGE idiot. Especially after I looked into him some more. C was right. J.O. (that's what I call him now) is my man. We pretty  much share the same food philosophy. Please enjoy it in his words:

Fully Clothed Naked Chef.

 "My philosophy to food and healthy eating has always been about enjoying everything in a balanced, and sane way. Food is one of life's greatest joys yet we've reached this really sad point where we're turning food into the enemy, and something to be afraid of. I believe that when you use good ingredients to make pasta dishes, salads, stews, burgers, grilled vegetables, fruit salads, and even outrageous cakes, they all have a place in our diets. We just need to rediscover our common sense: if you want to curl up and eat macaroni and cheese every once in a while – that's alright! Just have a sensible portion next to a fresh salad, and don't eat a big old helping of chocolate cake afterwards.

Knowing how to cook means you'll be able to turn all sorts of fresh ingredients into meals when they're in season, at their best, and cheapest! Cooking this way will always be cheaper than buying processed food, not to mention better for you. And because you'll be cooking a variety of lovely things, you'll naturally start to find a sensible balance. Some days you'll feel like making something light, and fresh, other days you'll want something warming and hearty. If you've got to snack between meals, try to go for something healthy rather than loading up on chocolate or potato crisps. Basically, as long as we all recognize that treats should be treats, not a daily occurrence, we'll be in a good place. So when I talk about having a 'healthy' approach to food, and eating better I'm talking about achieving that sense of balance: lots of the good stuff, loads of variety, and the odd indulgence every now and then." - J.O.

I will say that I probably believe in a few more indulgences than J.O., but still, I feel the same except I say potato "chips" instead of "crisps" and prefer Big "Ole" instead of big "old". It makes a difference. Either way, C turned me onto his great world of online cooking videos and I'll definitely be picking up some of his books.

So back to it, R & C are putting together this amazing meal and as R & I drift back over to the kitchen I realize I need to start documenting. C was pulling together a tomato salad with chorizo that I can't even being to say enough about. It was, of course, a Jamie Oliver inspired dish. 

I dipped my pizza crust in this.... be jealous.

 Then Chef C took is pizza crust out of the oven. He had made the pizza with a ready made dough from Central Market. He left it out in a covered bowl at room temp for a few hours so it could warm up and gently rise. He spread a simple base sauce over it with sliced fresh buffalo mozzarella. That was all that went in the oven. The rest came flying forward in a fantastic way, freshly dropped upon the warm pizza base...

 chorizo slices and fresh arugula have been added. Then I heard "I'm not done yet."

Fresh chunks of Mozzarella and still "not done yet."

FINALLY done with fresh Parma Ham and some drizzled EV Olive Oil.

Adding back in the beautiful orzo pasta that R put together, my plate was going to look like Thanksgiving day.

SO fresh, SO delicious & a goat cheese bonus.

Upon my request, C created a perfect plate. As a reward, we let him eat it. And he did. With second portions  if I am not mistaken. I had seconds too... and would have had thirds, but you'll find out why I didn't soon.

"Let's have this for dinner every night!" said the fat girl who lives inside of me.

 This entire meal was just perfection. Major kudos to R & C for one of the best meals I have had at someone else's home. And for the GRAND FINALE.... R hits one out of the park.

Not prefrozen, not from a box, not from a bag... hand mixed homemade Chocolate Chip Cookies.

Fresh from the Oven.

I learned about the "naked" chef and C learned that you just "plop" cookies down on a cookie sheet and they go from "squidgy" to round and delicious. 

I still can't get over this meal. It had something for everyone. Then I fell in love with the Hunter Wellies, while S had his own take home prize.

Good friends bring Scotch home from the UK.

If you are going to make your own pizza at home, take some advice from C: "the key to making pizza is less is more." Although I'm pretty sure I didn't desire less chorizo, less parma ham, less cheese, OR less arugula, so take that as you may.

Here is the youtube vid of Jamie Oliver making his Tomato Salad with Chorizo in a field. Really, in the middle of a field. This guy is special.

There is much to be said about a perfect night dining at home with wonderful friends. It is one of my very favorite things in the world. I'm just glad my friends let me blog about it later.

-RT

PS: The wellies were put to good use in the rain on Sunday morning and they matched perfectly with Landy's duck PJs from The Peabody.

POP UP RECIPE: Elvis and Bacon

An Evlis My Little Pony Unicorn = The end of the world is near

It's the 35th anniversary of the day that Elvis died... or did he? Either way, here is a not at all healthy sandwich to commemorate this day. When it comes to celebrating milestones (two days in a row no less) we add butter and we fry things. It's time to take one for the team and go to town on a sandwich inspired by one of the King's favorites. I don't know if he did his exactly this way, we just don't talk as much as we used to.

Fried Peanut Butter, Banana, & Bacon Sandwich

Ingredients:

(2) Slices of white bread

Butter (room temp)

Creamy Peanut Butter

1 Lightly spotted (for sweetness) Banana

4 Slices of Bacon

Honey (optional)

Fry your bacon until it's nice and crispy. I repeat, NOTHING is healthy about this except for the bananas. 

Place the fried bacon on a plate with some paper towels to catch the grease.

Butter your bread like you are making a grilled cheese sandwich. I just butter one side, but feel free to take it to the next level and do both. Spread the peanut butter on the non buttered side of each slice, add the thinly sliced banana to both sides. Layer the bacon and close. If you wanted to add some honey you would do that on top of the bacon or banana.

Then you just treat it like an actual grilled cheese sandwich and put it in a preheated pan, flipping it until both sides are golden brown. 

Slice in half and eat immediately. Also, gain 5lbs immediately. 

On a somewhat related note, does anyone else think that Paris Jackson (Michael Jackson's "daughter") looks like Lisa Marie Presley? Let's start some new conspiracy theories. 

This:

+

a donation from some random white guy (possibly him):

MJ's Dermatologist

=

Just saying...

Y'all, don't turn into Fat Elvis. Eat these bacon dream sandwiches in moderation (like once every 5 years). You know, after you have some lobster. 

-RT