I'd do anything for love (but really I wouldn't because I won't do "that")

I spent a fair amount of time in 1993 wondering exactly what Meatloaf wouldn't do for love. Also, I still don't know. I think I might not be deep enough. Have you seen Meatloaf? He is obviously not a shallow guy. I have discovered recently that "that" has nothing to do with going on celebrity apprentice. So we can rule it out. If you have figured out what "that" is, please let me know. It's been almost 20 years and I'm waiting with bated breath. So that's enough about Meatloaf, let's talk more about meatloaf.

See where we are going here?

I love meatloaf for various reasons. Most of them run along the same lines of why I love casseroles. You can eat them for more than one meal and the oven cooks them for you. Meatloaf also tastes great as a sandwich and I love it even more now because babies love meatloaf. At least mine does. Any recipe that can easily add people AND baby meals is like a triple shooting star life bonus. SO let's pretend that you are on a stay at home day and your husband says "can you get the meatloaf started?" and like a normal, sane person you reply "sure, where is the recipe?" Tips for life, people... there was no recipe. He had just purchased 2lbs of ground meat and figured "we had stuff." This instance works out well for everyone. We did indeed have the "stuff", but I won't do "that". Figure it out. 

So step one in my meatloaf adventure was to find a basic recipe. I went to my friend Internet and hollered at my BFF Google. Dear Google, Please send me an easy meatloaf recipe.....  My buddy G led me to allrecipes.com and gave me a recipe to work with. I had to make adjustments though, because the recipe I found called for 1.5lbs of ground meat and I had 2lbs that I wanted to use all of, but either way my kitchen scale has been dead for over three years. There. I confessed. We were going to have to use two pounds of meat. I assembled the ingredients. 

I found some panko bread crumbs in the pantry, we always have eggs since it's L's breakfast of choice, I keep a sack of white onions in the pantry as well becuase they take a while to spoil and can go in almost anything. With a baby we also always have milk. But I guess we always have milk regardless because S drinks it like a 16 year old boy. I also got out a couple of the fresh tomatoes we got in our Farmhouse Delivery, but I didn't end up using them. 

Onion chopping 101:

Cut a grid in the onion without cutting all of the way through. If you need more information on what a grid is, ask google. There is one pictured on the onion above. Then turn the onion on its side and begin to slice. Everything is already chopped for you. You could also use a slap chop, but I find it is sometimes inconsistent with chop size and it also hurts your hand after a while. Also, that guy is just really, really creepy. Slap chop guy. Moving on.

I preheated the oven to 350, let my ground meat come to room temp, and also let my milk come a little to room temp. I decided to add in some sliced garlic and took out the tomatoes. Then we ended up with this:

To compensate for the extra half pound of meat, I used a large onion, increased the milk from 1C to 1 and 1/3C, and increased the bread crumbs from 1 C to 1 1/3C. I thought about adding an extra egg, but in the end decided not to. 

So if you are a woman (or a man, I guess) who has longer fingernails, the best way to mix your ingredients together involves two hands and some latex gloves that don't have powder on them. Something like this. These gloves are just great to keep under your sink for cooking, especially if you cook with peppers often. Too many times I kind of forget I just held a jalapeno and rub my eye. The worst is when you do it and pick/"scratch" your nose. IT burns. Actually I've heard of worse things, but we are talking about meatloaf. Combine all of your ingredients in a bowl, and mix together with your hands. I didn't have gloves and I didn't want to pick ground meat out from under my fingernails so I used a potato masher. It was eh. It worked in a pinch. Gloves would be better or find someone who bites their nails (tell them to wash their hands) and have them do this.  Also, salt and pepper to taste. 

Mish Mash.

Next I made a little something something to go on top of the meatloaf. The recipe on allrecipes.com called for 2 tablespoons of mustard, 2 tablespoons of brown sugar and 1/3 C of ketchup. I just eyeballed it, keeping in mind my meatloaf was going to be larger. I used dijon mustard. 

Top Sauce

I prefer to mold my meatloaf and cook it in a larger pan than to do it in a loaf pan. You take the meat and make sure there is room so only the base is touching something, and mold it into a loaf shape. 

Add the top sauce over the top.  That is why it's called "top sauce"

And place in oven. The original recipe had a cooking time of one hour. Because I used more meat and more ingredients overall, I checked on it at one hour, but ended up cooking it for an hour and fifteen minutes total. Here is the finished product:

At this point if I had extra liquid I would use a baster to get it out so it doesn't soak back in. Well I spent some time looking for a baster and couldn't find one. In Landon's kitchen play drawer there are all sorts of kitchen tools and random things that are safe for her. In that drawer I found this:

Hmmm. Handy kitchen tool?

Although I had a c-section I was still sent home from the hospital with one of these fancy things that was never used. It made a really great baster. It would have made an even better story if it had been used. If you are unsure of what exactly this bottle is used for you can view the product here. Then if you don't know your anatomy, ask our friend google. Fun times. Apparently I really will do anything for meatloaf... even "that".

We had our meatloaf with some grilled okra from our farm delivery. We put some olive oil and salt on the okra then cooked it in the grill wok. 

Served with a side of farm fresh cherry tomatoes. And lots of ketchup. Because while you shouldn't put ketchup on your steak, you can put it ALL OVER your meatloaf.

Meatloaf is a great recipe to play with on your own. You can add spinach, shaved carrots, mushrooms, or keep it simple and basic. It is also a sneaky way to get kids who don't eat their veggies to eat veggies without knowing it. No, ketchup is not a vegetable (even if the govt says so), I'm talking shaved and chopped up veggies cooked in there. 

Your final dish might also look something like this:

I ordered my Meatloaf rare.

Don't forget to order some kitchen gloves and a spare perineal cleanser for basting emergencies. Advice for life. 

-RT

Ignorance is Bliss. So is Stir Fry.

Hello Internet. My name is RT and I'm a Sugar Addict. I know this because I took a quiz online and the results confirmed my suspicions. I also took a quiz online that said I was going to die at 92, so it's totally fine that I have a sugar addiction. If you have been reading along you know that I have a thing for nestle fudge ice cream drumsticks right now. It started out as a fling and was on it's way to becoming a full fledged relationship. I was making special trips to pick him up, we had a date almost every night, and sometimes he slept over (in the freezer). 

Hey there handsome fella.

Then I made a big mistake... I broke into his phone and read his texts! Wait... I mean I actually looked at the nutrition label. I had clearly been telling myself lies, as one sometimes does in a hot and heavy relationship. I could no longer ignore what was staring me right in the face.... 300 calories per drumstick. That, my friends, is much more than just one glass of wine. Well, unless it's this glass:

Seriously, someone buy me this.

And the story gets even more sorted. Sometimes I went back for seconds. On one lonely day during nap time, I skipped lunch in favor of three drumsticks. It was getting bad. I knew it had to come to an end. The calorie information is the last straw and, well, I wanted you all to know it's over. Our relationship was much better before I knew all of the facts. Now I just feel like a cheap, dirty sugar addict with no self control. So I came home to do one of my favorite things, ask google questions. "Google," I asked, "am I a sugar addict?" Google found a handy quiz for me. It is true/false. Let's review.

1. I don’t eat refined sugar every day These answers are complicated. Usually, FALSE. Fine. FALSE

2. I can go more than a day without eating some kind of sugar-containing food If I try, I can. But I don't try. So I'm going to give myself a False.

3. I never have cravings for sugar, coffee, chocolate, peanut butter or alcohol Just False. FALSE FALSE FALSE.

4. I’ve never hidden sweets around the house so I can eat them later Like in the bathroom? Hidden from whom? I'm pretty sure this is TRUE

5. I can stop after eating one bite of pastry or one piece of candy What are the circumstances? Is there a gun to my head? I guess I can, even though I usually don't want to, so TRUE.

6. There are times when I have no sugar around the house When I eat it all or when I'm trying to lose weight. Does fruit count? Because it shouldn't. TRUE.

7. I can have sweets in the house without eating them So in this scenario, do I have PMS? That would really change this answer. But TRUE.

8. I can go at least 3 hours without eating without shakes, fatigue or bad moods I didn't know we were getting this serious. But also, I have a 15 month old. I am always fatigued. So I need to tie in the food and the fatigue? I'm so fatigued by this quiz. TRUE.

9. I do not eat something sweet after every meal Harsh. This question is harsh. And the statement is FALSE. Because special K red berries is like eating candy for breakfast. Be honest. It is.

10. I rarely drink coffee or eat donuts or sweet rolls for breakfast Is this TRUE? yes. I don't drink coffee. Do I wish I had donuts and sweet rolls for breakfast often? Yes.

11. I can go more than an hour after waking without eating TRUE

12. I don’t drink sweetened soft drinks every day TRUE. I really do believe that diet soda in particular is the devil and will lead you to an early death. When something has zero calories, there is something wrong. Full sugar soda should be consumed in moderation. Like fountain coca cola poured over sonic ice with a fresh squeeze of lime juice. Preach.

Here is what I got: 

"For the record, if you answered four of these questions FALSE then stop lying and seek help for your sugar addiction."

That's a little harsh. I just answered all of her questions and she is calling me a liar. So how does she know I'm not lying about my sugar addiction for blog material attention? Here is my big girl moment and I'm putting this out there for all of the internet to see. S, you were right. I was eating too many chocolate fudge filled drum sticks. Print this out to save and throw in my face later. Actually, never mind. Don't do that. It might not end well.

 Anyway, ignorance is bliss, knowledge is power, blah, blah, blah. I'm switching to Skinny Cow and stepping my way down. I cut my calories in half. Everyone do a cheer. And I didn't have one tonight. Because I had a couple of glasses of wine to get me through the breakup. Regular glasses, not full bottle size glasses. You know what else goes down as easy as a nice pinot noir in the middle of July? Stir fry. (Just go with me on this one.)

Stir fry is actually a great and easy meal for the family or just the two of you or just for you. All you  need is love some veggies, add in a protein if you want, some sauces for flavoring, and best case scenario, a wok. Happy healthy Asian delights. (I think that is a meal I ordered at a Chinese restaurant once.)

Here is how our Stir Fry Night went....

Veggies: Two heads of broccoli (chopped), one red pepper, chopped shallots,
sliced garlic, and sliced green onion.

We used skirt steak marinated in soy sauce, salt, pepper, and a bit of sugar. (Addict)

Here is our rice cooker. It is making rice. It infuriates me.
I need a new one. Please send suggestions.

Seasonings: Light soy sauce, sesame seed oil, & oyster sauce (not pictured)

The broc takes the longest to cook, so it goes in the wok first
with some grapeseed oil and some soy sauce.

Shallots and garlic added.

Show me the beef.

Red pepper so they'll still have some crunch and green onion tops.

The rice is ready. Seriously, someone tell me a great rice cooker. I need it.

Here is dinner! Leftovers were amazing with a little Frank's Hot Sauce.
You could also add some Sriracha.

The reason stir fry is wonderful is because in a wok you can cook with less oils making it healthier. Also, there isn't a lot of guess work with cooking times since you cut everything up before you cook it and you can easily see how it is going. Make up your own stir fry recipes using different ingredients and sauces. It's a fun thing to cook as a couple or with older kids. 

And pour a little pinot out tonight for my homie, fudge filled drumstick. 

Pour out all of the Ramona Pinot you can get your hands on. I'll help.

 We had it good, real good. We were hot and heavy, and cold and delicious. But all good things must come to an end, and it's still bikini season in Texas.

Here's to attempting the skinnies for a little while longer. When winter comes, I won't want ice cream anyway. 

Flat tummies and skinny cow fudge pops,

- RT

Like the Raising Texas Facebook page and share posts as we try to build fans. When we hit 50, the person with the most shares gets a Goode Co or Royer's Pie!! I promise it's worth it. 

Surprise! I am actually Kate Middleton

Aren't you kind of shocked? Me too. Just to rehash, this blog is 80% about easy healthy eating. This post falls into the other undefinable 20% that we are gambling on together. So back to me being Kate Middleton. Incidentally, this has nothing to do with the "Prince of our Hearts" YM Magazine I recently found stashed away in my childhood closet. It has to do with the rewearing of fancy dresses. 

I also used up those love tarot cards. Oh, and the 24 clues to snag your crush were a total fail.

We are leaving town yet again for a wedding in Louisville. Weddings are fun when you get to leave town and see people who you don't see often, oh, and also when you are not pregnant and can drink the appropriate amount to really enjoy the wedding and dance you ass off. What I HATE about out of town weddings is packing. This problem is easily solved when it is a wedding for a friend of mine. Usually in these cases I bombard my friends H & L with photos of me trying on dresses and trying to pick out shoes from my limited shoe collection and they help guide me or give me the approval that I am seeking and not getting at home. They both live really far away. Depressing. But they put up with me. That's why they are members of the BFC. 

Best Friends Club. Snuggles forever.

This particular wedding is for one of my husband's friends. So I'm depending on him to help me feel out the tone of the events and my appropriate attire. As much as I wish I could just run to the store and pick out a new dress for every event (and I really REALLY do wish this) I have to buy things like tiny bathing suits and baby Toms in every color (thanks D) so I don't really have the budget. I head to the bedroom and turn into Kate Middleton and prepare to rewear.

Unfortunately I am missing the perfect amount of fancy hats to make my dresses like new.

The first dress I try on is a fuchsia strapless DVF party dress I got for H's wedding 4 years ago. It has a full skirt and pockets and is super comfy. I like to think through my wears. It had one hit with my college group, one hit for NYE with a large group of Houston friends, one hit for a wedding with a different group of Houston friends, and the last group standing is S's college group. I pair it with some shoes and walk into the living room ready for some feedback feeling like this: 

Work it.

Response: "what are you doing?" 

RT: trying to figure out what I'm going to wear to the wedding.

Silence

RT: So? 

"I like that dress."

Ok. What did I expect? He likes it. That's fine.

I head back into the bedroom and find another cocktail dress that I bought for my father's 70th birthday in the midst of my good skinnies before I had a baby and after I did a two day protein fast. It zipped, which was a start, but I knew it was a little tight over my chest. I was feeling a little like this:

I didn't wait for a response. I went for it so I could point it out first.

RT: This one's a little tight on my chest, right?  

"Yeah, it looks kind of weird. Also, the fabric is bunchy. And I can see your stomach and like where your belly button is."

silence

RT: Well in real life I would be wearing Spanx and they would make those two things disappear. 

"Oh"

I felt like this:

Usually I would love to feel like Blake Lively, but this is a fail.

Failure and an unprovoked additional response. I head straight back to my bedroom. Maybe the sisterwives have it all figured out. They get to live with other women for the rest of their lives. They never have to ask their husband for advice on proper attire. They just put on their prairie dress and braid their hair and go to town. But really, I miss living with my girlfriends. When you have an awful night where you feel fat in every outfit, you can pick out something better from their closet. When you don't know if your shoes are too boring (probably) or too matchy matchy, they will tell you. When you have the wrong purse for your outfit, they will pick one out for you. They will also make great getting ready to go out mixes that have oukast and britney on them. They will also drink everclear daqueries at home on a Saturday night with you in sweat pants. Shout out JJ. Best Friends' Club.

I try one last dress on and end up with a major idea. Our friends are getting married in August and they are having a 2pm ceremony and a 5pm reception. I could wear two dresses and have time for two totally different looks. This idea really excites me so I put on what would be my "ceremony look" and head back out to the living room. I felt like this, but in a cute dress:

S: "You know the wedding is outside and it is going to be really hot."

RT: this is for the other wedding. I thought I would do an outfit change and wear this to the ceremony and THEN (big reveal) wear a DIFFERENT dress to the reception. Maybe with different hair? 

S: "Ok"

silence

RT: Doesn't that sound fun? 

S: "Sure, if you want to."

This ended the fashion show. I went back to the bedroom, opened my suitcase and threw in about 6 dress options for Saturday night. I'll have time on Thursday and Friday to snag some of the ladies and get their opinions. Because if I think about putting on another outfit and walking into the living room I imagine it going something like this:

And for the reception, I was thinking an understated pale pink...

Yours as ever in the loyalty of the Queen, 

Kate Middleton

- RT